Snowflakes!!!

This christmas has been much about snowflakes. My present deco, card deco, christmas tree ornaments and present wrappers and many others. And they're all pretty. No two snowflakes are the same eh?

Amazing.

Even as this year wasn't as Chrismassy due to exams finishing late which didn't give me much time to go christmas shopping and enjoy the days before christmas in a RELAXING way. So much preparation had to be done and I didn't get to make the ultimate christmas cards that I pictured in my head. Was pretty frustrating. Ended up punching paper shapes and getting fingers sticky, which at the end of the day looked like some card anyone can get off the shelf at shopping malls. Actually, there are better ones there. haha. Oh well. I tried. There's always next year!

Things never happen the same way twice, as Aslan says. And so, it was a different christmas this year. I don't usually celebrate christmas with anyone other than my church friends and family. Victor, Shok Chen and Pei Chern came last year and though I didn't really get to spend time with them after, it was the first. This year, Jas and James celebrated christmas eve with me! Okay there wasn't a super cool party after but it was different and I enjoyed the time spent (sorry James I totally forgot about the time, hope you didn't get into trouble). I feel loved!!! Manda and Esther, next time yes? we'll meet up soon!! I miss everyone coming togetherrrr...

Dance was fun. Dancing as a present was the happiest and smiley-est dance I've EVER done! (though the making of it was tedious). Woohoo! Apart from acting super kiddy, jaw stretching and dancing like no one's looking, it was pretty fun. hahaha! The last dance felt like it lasted for just a minute. I knew I didn't stretch as much as I was supposed to for certain parts..everything just happened so fast. Usually 3 rounds of it would hardly make me pant but the once on stage got me sweating. Maybe it was the adrenaline rush, or the lights??haha. First time in black tights too, but i guess when I'm on stage, there's no going back to the whole self-conscious thing. heh. But i had fun. The ending went well, no imbalance pose!! God, thank you! I'm already excited for the next one!

I'm glad everything went well...except for certain parts when the music was cut off and Stephen almost missed his singing climax. I hope everyone had a good night.

Surprise! I had sweet presents from friends I've never gotten before. I guess it's because I got more involved in uth this year =). Jon Ngin, Jon Roberts, Lionel, Abi, Ai Vee. Thank you!!!! (I didn't prepare enough cards. Shucks.) Awesome lil' gifts. I got NERDS! candy of my own! hahaha. Yes, I am very happy with that.

I got home past 12 after A&W and not ordering anything. lalala. Roads were Scarily empty. Then, the house was empty which was pretty saddening. Parents still weren't back so I thought I wouldn't get to go to Chat's place this year. About 1.25am, I reminded them that my siblings were there so mum and I went to pick them up but ended up staying there for awhile with a few who were still there. A few kiddos under 12 were wide awake and enjoying themselves. A huge bottle of sparkling juice was popped and we drank merrily. =) The baby grand piano was producing nice music too.

So what did I do?? grab a few pieces of lamb and turkey and some pizza. While standing and eating, Chat messed with my unique dress, tying it in all sorts of ways whether reasonable or not. At the end of they day, I left the house in a tube dress after arriving with a halter. So fun so fun. Me likey my dressy.

3am!!! Home. Was so tired but I had to get all that make up off my face. Ash and I messed with the camera for abit before going under the covers at 3.30 and replayed everything about the special night I had.

The 3am look.

I was in such a deep sleep until 11am+ today! Thank God, no headaches. Washed up, felt somewhat confident in a purple spaghetti top with a scarf and went to friend's place for popiah! YUM! Snapped shots with the aweshomme camera too.

Then Joshua called and said he left something in my post box. I could hardly wait!

Got home and sat down and realized I haven't checked it so I ran outside and found a thin piece of paper with my name on it. Now I hardly get stuff in the mail so I was like the most excited lil' gurl who got a cotton candy for christmas! Sat down, opened it....and.....laughed and laughed. After receiving a penguin card for my birthday, penguin postcard when he came back the last time, I was expecting something penguin-ish too but I would never have guessed this 'motion' penguin picture ruler thing!!! The penguins in the picture were waddling whenever I tilted it up and down. Seriously funny!!!!! Tis be the last present from Josh, from Aus and it is just sooooo cute!!!! hahaha..I'm still playing with it. I shall record a video. It's motioned penguins!

I'm a little frustrated with not enough time to do my best for these cards!!!

=( super fail. And waking up with a headache isn't good at all.

Come on!!!! it's tomorrow!!!!!

A missed dream

I want to dance like she did.

So much till it hurts, because I could never.

People say parents get their children to do what they couldn't. I think I understand that feeling. *daydreams*

"Christmas Candlelight"

My first time at KL PAC. (Yes thank God for awesome friends). Black walls with colourful chairs! I like.

So anyway, glad I managed to enjoy it considering I woke up feeling terrible and staying home so much.

We had good seats so I managed to see everything clearly...and i spotted 2 harps!! oh so beautiful...the performance was pretty well done. Nice flow of music and awesome soprano singers. Power. There were these two boys who sang a duet, Whoa my goodness they were amazing. (talk about Justin Bieber, now I feel kinda sorry for him that everyone makes fun of his 'unbroken' voice). I guess the cute chubby indian guy Looked fine as he sang but something about the skinny chinese boy with that voice surprised me. haha.

Considering I went to a music store yesterday, I paid closer attention to the instruments. Seeing the lady nodding her head to follow the timing before she clangs her cymbals, the guy coming in at random times with the tambourine, trying to differentiate the sound of the flute and clarinet, fingers on the string instruments and watching with wonder how the girl aims for the harp strings. Sometimes my eyes look all over the place instead of sitting back, relaxing and listening.

I felt pretty inspired tonight. =)

What to do first what to do first??!!!!!

I have 2 weeks of break before a crazy semester. ONLY TWO. After a lousy paper today.

No big happening celebration for the end of exams but i did enjoy my day! It started off with making an effort to dressing up a lil'. Then, taking a 20 min nap before my paper felt really good. After our paper, Warren came over because we were going to do Something since we are FREEEE! finally.

So we followed James to get his super awesome, exciting, aweshome new toy!!!! It wasn't entirely my fault we didn't find the shop sooner. Just partly. So yes, such joy. haha. Bet he's going to meddle with it for hours when he gets home.

Bentley Music store was amazing!! See, once again....friends bring me to interesting places. I would love to try everything in there, if only I could. Saw this wooden-Purple-painted electric guitar that cost RM9,990. Well, at least i got to touch it. =) I should get a boyfriend who owns a music store!!!! muahahahaha.

So yes, I feel happy, bummy without guilt, and I can watch movies, go out and read books! well not much in 2 weeks though. Oh well. I feel so smiley. The cool weather is reinforcing this feeling. mmmmm...

Wokay! I'm off to plan my present deco (with No help of those 2 today), watch movies and pick my book for this 2 weeks. And of course, fix my circadian rhythm.

"This Little Child'

Who would of thought that long ago
So very far away,
A little child would be born
And in a manger laid?
And who would have thought this little child
Was born the King of kings,
The Son of just a carpenter
For whom the angels sing?
And who would have thought that as He grew
And with other children played
This child with whom they laughed and sang
Would die for them some day
And who would have thought this little child
Could make a blind man see,
Feed the hungry, make rich the poor
And set the sinner free?
Oh who would have thought this little child
Was who the prophets said?
Would take away the sins of man
And rise up from the dead!

 
And I believe! And I will always sing,
"This little child is the King!"
Oh, I believe. And, I will always sing,
"This little child
He is the King of kings!"


Many years have come and gone
Yet this world remains the same.
Empires have been built and fallen
Only time has made a change.
Nation against nation.
Brother against brother.
Men so filled with hatred
Killing one another.
And over half the world is starving
While a banner of decency is torn.
Debating over disarmament.
Killing children before they're born.
And fools who march to win the right
To justify their sin.
Oh every nation that has fallen
Has fallen from within!
Yet in the midst of this darkness,
There is a hope, a light that burns.
This little child -the King of kings-
Some day will return!

 
And I believe! And I will always sing,
"This little child is the King!"
Oh, I believe. And, I will always sing,
"This little child
He is the King of kings!"


Who would have thought this little child
Is who the prophets said
Will return to judge this world
The living and the dead?
Oh, can't you see that long ago,
So very far away,
This little child-- our only hope--
Was born a King that day!?

Farewell, my faithful friend

It's been a few years since we met,

But only spent the last couple of months close,

Today as I opened the door, you were still there,

For the goodbyes and last glances.

You were so clean, so spotless,

I didn't hesitate to hug you one last time,

Captured pictures of you,

To be kept as memories, that'll last a lifetime.

When the clock struck 11,

I knew in my heart that there was no turning back,

You went out the driveway, down the road,

And all I could do was watch you go.....

And wish you all the best as you begin a new journey!

When I decided to be brave...

Oh man was that tough. Bringing up the subject was one thing. Thinking of points to 'rebut' was another. I did spend time thinking through the 'points' to say and how to say it. 

I made green tea. Sipped my drink and wrote stuff on my notebook to help me distract myself when the conversation gets too stiff. 

Well.....they asked for time and i agreed. So that's that. I just hope it'll be a yes. After giving it my all for that hour, holding back water from my eyes and speaking as MATURE and responsible as i can. It's about time I asked about the reasons and validity of their answers. And it felt pretty good. Dad was 'pleased' for me doing it. My heart wanted to melt (though he was just messing with his phone the whole time, which was good for me). heh.

God, thank you for setting the right mood. Everything about today went well. I'm glad i became a Lil' stronger. Though now it feels like nothing's changed, I'm sure there was at least a lil' bit of difference. 

*deep breaths* 

 

Today is Jursday

I just realized most of the names of people I texted today begin with the letter J!!!!

-Aunty Jacky ('aunty' doesn't count)

-Joel

-Jeremy

-James

-Jarren

-Jenn ming

This didn't get to go up this week =(

No one was there to certify it. Again, upset. Then the rain poured so bad. I didn't like the drive home. 

Oh well......

Ta-da....

"BOYS"...*sigh*....(recalls Ps Daniel Ross)

Just what I'd like to do..heh. 

THIS IS SUPER NONSENSE! SUPER NONSENSE......

GOD, I NEED A BOYFRIEND. WHY? SO THAT I CAN SHUN 'REDUNDANT' PEOPLE AWAY.

SHUUUNNNN...AWAAAAYY....(this is not due to desperation. Don't get me wrong)

NOW, WHO SHALL VOLUNTEER?? HAHAHAHAHA. Or make up a fake, believable one for me...

*exhales*

"If you have nothing good or encouraging to say, just Don't. "

(What mummy always says)

You hurt the person and people around who hear it are just disturbed. 

4th of December

Finals start today. And today feels like an awesome day.

Feeling the cool breeze even as i had my cozy jacket on, with 'Flying' playing on my ipod was the most soothing moment this morning. mmmm. 

Where's my hug? I want one tooooo...

Bakar minyak tengah malam

I am going to finish or at least complete 90% of my malaysian studies assignment + public speaking speech for finals before the sun rises. Without coffee. *deep breaths*

Truth won't Change

Waking up to warmer mornings,

New trends, new rules, new mindsets,

Adjusting to environments,

Having to deal with different experiences,

I fear change.

Observing one's aging process,

The hair loss, wrinkles, and slower movements,

Looking back to moments of regrets,

Not knowing what lies ahead,

I fear time.

But these are all what life is,

It's normal, happens to everyone,

So sometimes...

I fear truth.

She now drives!!!!

It's the second time Lydia and I are having dim sum for breakfast at the same place for our catching up session. 

After a long day and lack of sleep I wake up to another busy day. Which starts with this friend of mine, giving me encouragement for everything. 

One of the many things i got from her today : "....The only thing or part of you that will hurt, is your Pride". I wondered for awhile, it sounded like pride was a separate part of me. Like it's my pride hurting and not the entire me. Just something that got me today. 

We spent 2 hours talking and sharing and drinking down cup after cup of Jasmine tea. It's such an interesting and comforting feeling. Feels like as if she might be who i might be in future. Sounds freaky eh? But it's somewhat sensible. Things that i go or went through and finding it hard to explain, she understands and explains it in simple language which matches the feelings i had or have. What a substantial conversation we had. About church, psychology, youth, self-esteem, dance, intimidation, church speakers and whatever else under the sun.  

Grinning Friday

I had a fun friday! 

Skipping class for children's day at peter&jane was a wise choice. Definitely. So much fun seeing Again, their amazing and prettiest outfits! Beautiful, colourful dresses with angel wings, some of the girls had. Boys with handsome hairstyles and interesting outfits such as Spiderman and army outfits. Boy, the amount of food there was...fuuuhh. One child's parent brought three boxes of wondermilk cupcakes!!!! and individual ones for the teachers. WAAHHH! And the amount of junk food the children brought home in their party packs were heavenly to them. I will miss them. sigh. 

Nearing the end of school, the children gathered at the assembly hall for games and songs. As i walked there, i heard children singing in unison "...baby baby baby oooohhh, like baby baby baby noooo..." I was pretty surprised. Kindi kiddos singing this song??!! Of all the awesome and educational songs I've heard them sing. hahaha. Kids nowadays eh? 

Ash went back to visit. Soon the teachers were talking about how she was last time and how she's grown....we joined the teachers for a yummy lunch before going home, looking forward to more exciting moments awaiting me!

So yes, i got home and felt very excited. Like a lil' girl awaiting her present. haha. Nicole just got back a week ago! So when everyone came, we did some catching up, sang Su a belated birthday song, had cake and started google-ing and youtube-ing for ideas on make up and hair. haha. There were interesting, impossible, and crazy ideas. We watched a video on how to use a hair straightener to make curls. It looked easy. But we failed. haha. 

Choco and tiramisu!!!! 

Nicole became the guinea pig/lab rat. Sounds mean? well she enjoyed it, i'm sure. =) Get to ban leng!

Sadly, Su and manda had to leave early..*sniff sniff*.

Double eyelid stickers? failed on me. haha. Esther then applied a thicker layer of eyeliner on me. Which turned out, me looking just like her! 

Big big eyes

I love my friends. Oh sho much!! God is awesome! Prom was at a pretty perfect timing. Jas and manda just finished their mocks, esther managed to come after her M'sian studies paper (no like you!), Su just finished SAM and Cole is back from Aus!!! The best part was the preparation. I felt like it was my birthday again. To be so blessed with friends who don't stay nearby to come to my place for hours to do me up for an event they won't even be attending. How i wish i could bring them along and put them in my lil' bag just like Mary Poppins.

So, i got an interesting hairstyle with cold hairspray all over. Esther said my hair was TOO SMOOTH. Such a compliment. haha. There were not enough bobby pins. And the curls didnt turn out the way it should have been. Su and Esther worked on my eyes *blink blink*. Spent 80% of make up time on it. Just the eyes..goodness. Truly is a tedious job but with the artist around, it turned out amazing. Thank you S-ther!!! hehe. 

Lastly, Jas, Esther and Nicole picked out the accessories. Seriously, i didn't need to do anything the whole time! Except for closing my eyes, looking at certain angles, and not blinking.

Oh, God is amazing again because I just found out a day before that Priscilla had BLACK SATIN GLOVES!!!!!! she even dropped by to pass it to me at 8am today. I am So loved. Yes. haha. At least SO much for today. *smiles*

Prom night. Reached pretty late but i wasn't. Phew! and one more thing to thank God for is...dad didn't make a fuss. When i couldn't follow Su home, he said he would send me. I was so glad he didn't say much about going for prom and what i was gonna do there and why i didn't bring a shawl. I guess it's God's grace again, for me to have a good time for the night. 

As always, we took pictures and more pictures. I can't believe that this many of my friends wouldn't be around next year. But I shall not worry about that now. hehe.

Let's see...Being in a long dress wasn't easy. Lifting it up to avoid getting it wet or stepped on and walking nicely. haha. A friend once mentioned about teaching me how to be graceful and poised. Would have been hilarious. Anyways, i did enjoy myself. The music at the end was nice and people dancing in pairs. That's what prom should have, no? The only sad thing was that we started pretty late and the hall cleared out pretty fast when it ended. 

I got home really late. Too late. God, thank you for your grace that daddy didn't lecture me about it and that i got home safe and sound. Thank you for awesome friends who stay so far away but drive me home anyway.

I had a great day and i shall go to bed tonight with a grin on my face, recalling the unforgettable and happy moments i had. All thanks to my Daddy in heaven who loves me and assures me that.................................

          I AM LOVED.

Girls, you know who you are...Thank you sooo much. Your effort, time, energy and love. I could say this all day for days, months and maybe years to come. When we do this again. In future. Yes Jas?? *wink wink*  We Will do more catching up! Soon! 

I feel terrible. Temperature up, cough worse, random runny nose and i couldn't sleep still the whole night. Please go away..leave me alone. 

Here i am, waiting for Warren to come over to work on our assignment. Current Progress = 0%. Thank God it's only 2 pages. 

Murphy's Law!! i am not going to keep you in my head today. Its 9 in the morning and i am going to have a productive day. Yesh! 

Monday morning's fun

For once i got to spend time playing with the kiddos at kindergarten. It's the last week of school and so there's nothing much left for me to do and most of them are just finishing their last few pages of their workbooks. Played slapping hand games and told stories. Typical princess stories, where the prince slays the dragon. haha. As always, time flies when you're having fun. The teacher didn't realize we went overtime and had to rush snack period. awwww. 

We went to the playground today!! managed to catch pretty good pictures with good lighting. The sun was up up up! One of the girls zoomed down the slide, jumped off after and shouted "My bum bum is on fire!!" Soon after, one by one they all started saying it. Running around with their hands on their bums.

I enjoyed my time at kindi today. And i found out they have Children's day this Friday. Woohoo! I plan to skip my boring class and go for fun. =)

The rest of my day was not cool. Talk about my speech on Murphy's Law today. The thought of it was annoyingly lingering in my head. My throat wasn't feeling any better (curse those fried sausages!! gah!!). Dad's spicy acar and paprika chicken wasn't helping. All because of friend sausages. Tsk.  

Celebrate today! The day we learnt our every move right, done choreographing Ash's candy cane dance and pressies dance. Such a relief. Relief. We even video-ed Chat's part to be sent to her. All the surpressed laugher looks on camera. Shucks. (Chat, although you don't read this, i hope you appreciate the embarrassment.haha). The 5+ hours spent in church today was joyfully productive. 

Woo hoo!! Thank you God for a good and cheerful time of practice. More to come!

Joy of being a blessing

CF-ers blessed people around campus with balloons today! I'm glad it turned out awesome. We didn't give food this year but i'm glad we didn't. Balloons, coloured markers and smiley faces are the best. 

This morning, i experienced what it's like to have something valuable that doesn't belong to me and that I had the choice whether i should keep it or not. Had the weirdest feeling. My first thought was that someone had dropped it and I'll hang on to it until someone calls. After awhile, I thought of times when phones have been reported missing and when someone dials the number, it just goes into voicemail. Pretty easy job. Just shut the phone off, and there you have it. A new phone.

I'm glad i got to be someone's saviour today. And i'm glad i decided to wear the CF tee. Not sure if she noticed but if she did, praise God!! She sounded like the happiest and most grateful stranger. I wish I had balloons with me then.

I feel good today. Started off with a rainy morning. Got to college, turned off the engine, ate my lil bun and studied in the car while the air was cool. So nice that i decided to sleep for half an hour before getting onto the bus and off to class. mmmm. 

*Punches the invisible punch bag* 

Oh world, i shall put you aside for awhile. 

*Drowned in music*

A Visitor's Trust

Family friends come to visit. Everyone is at the living room having a conversation about how everyone's been and catching up. Outside, the mother honks to let those at home know of her return and that the car outside needs to be moved for her to drive in.

The friend (husband) stands up, takes out his car keys from his pocket and hands it to the host's eldest daughter saying "Nah, go move the car. Very easy wan". 

Such an shocking moment she felt, and hopeful that somehow others will give her the same trust she received that day. 

"Fly fly" *swish swish* and a bomb for dinnah

Today i bought my first,

Long dress!!!!! (which shall not be revealed yet!)

My sister actually went scouting with me. Though her taste of dresses are no where near mine. For now. =)  I'm grateful that I didn't have to go alone and talk to myself while trying on dresses.

Initially wanted to get a short one since it wouldn't look too formal. But after trying on one and seeing that the price was reasonable, i started contemplating. I dislike such times when i have to make decisions. Approach-approach conflict situation. And so i consulted three wise men. No, actually women. 

I went back to the store in the evening with mum's friend and daughter since she was looking for a long dress. I just happen to find the best price for one just yesterday!  

Shopping is really really hard. Most of the time. Since i confirmed my decision on getting a long dress, there were more decisions to make. WHICH one. Ash was fixed on me getting the one i tried on yesterday while mum and i had doubts. Nice toga design, but certain angle of it made me look pregnant. Seriously. My mum and friend agreed too okay? Second reason, the shade of blue wasn't That appealing. Sister never gave up. haha. Oh well, her day will come. =) Another best part of my dress is that it doesn't need any altering! I usually turn away from long dresses because they will just get stepped on and sweep the floor when i get in it. Without a doubt.*smiles*

Her face says "Get THIS one. You better"

Other than the joy of getting my dress, i had a sumptuous, awesome, indulging dinner at Saujana Resort Hotel. Usually, my family goes there with friends for supper and i order a big cup of hot chocolate. mmmm. This time, we got to go there for dinner! dad's friend had discounts and he knew the people there so we had a great time. I ordered a RM50 (half price after discount) grilled salmon with lemon+butter sauce. I didn't expect it to be small piece on such a huge plate but that just meant, MORE space for dessert!!!!

Took the whole plate on purpose. tsk tsk tsk. haha

Salivating??

The dessert were buffet style so i prepared a plate full before the main dishes came. Talk about temptation under my nose, an arm's length away. To make it worse, mum brought fruits with melted chocolate. I can't believe i didn't notice the chocolate fountain! Terrible i tell you. After our main dish, sister and I were fascinating ourselves with putting a stick through marshmallows and fruits and letting chocolate flow onto it. Oooohh! that was just awesome. The cakes were awesome. If i had more space in my tummy, i would have gone for ice cream with chocolate and raisin toppings. Really thankful for my dinner.

 

Mum's Red Snapper

Lighted tree trunks. Nice. 

God, thank you for a dress that's under my budget. It doesn't need any alterations too! I am a happy girl. While reading Sue Jane's devo book that day, thank You for the assurance that you do bless your children with material stuff just as any parent would and that asking for such things isn't a terrible thing. Thank You for my sister who didn't complain yesterday. Thank You for blessing my family with friends who provide even for a meal! . I bet dinner costed a bomb if it weren't for the discounts. I'm overjoyed today! Love you!

Happy day!

It's Su Yi's and Charity's birthday!!!! and the day for prom dress shopping!!! 

What a day. Though i DIDN'T get my dress, i had fun climbing up many different looking(after so many, you just take notice) flights of stairs, had 'pink day' BR ice-cream for the first time, time with friends and exercise.  

Manda's new hairstyle!!! Didn't take pictures of the ice cream. Too caught up in eating it.

Bangsar lunch hour traffic is scary. Crossing roads with cars from different lanes is scary. How i parked today was scary *phew!*.

I should have taken pictures of the stairs we climbed today. Interesting, boring, happy, yucky and normal. haha. Jasmine did the bell ringing for every boutique we went to. Amanda popped in and out of the fitting room to amuse me. When Warren, Marivin and James joined us, they just made the atmosphere louder. Okay they provided entertainment anyways. 

So yeah, i didn't get a dress. Didn't even shortlist any. Most of them were too 'over the top', too bodily tight that i actually had to walk like a penguin, over budget and mainly tube dresses. It was fun trying stuff i would never have thought of wearing (that's the fun of window shopping!!!). And it's my first time walking all over that area. For a dress. heh. 

I need to do more searching. Not satisfied. I got home and tried to think of people who would go on this adventure with me, but i couldn't think of anyone. Jas and Manda did an awesome job today but it was tiring too, especially right after their exams. I've already asked too much of them. And so i thought and thought...there just wasn't anyone coming to mind. Quite sad eh? hehe. Can't ask my mum cos there'll be a lot of walking and running here and there. 

Finally(while watching Chinese drama), i decided on the girl next to me. YES, I am pulling my sister along with me. Hopefully, with the green light from mummy. Just needed someone who would 'tolerate' or be patient with me throughout. hehe. Well, she was smart enough to ask for her side of the deal. Oh well. At least i get someone to tag along without complaining. Even if she does, i can bully her. haha. The joy of having a younger sister.  Thank You Jesus!!! *smiles*

Chee woh turns 22!!!!!

Sorry i can't afford an iphone, ipad, korean girls, BMWs, FerrariS, watches that are more expensive then my sem fees, and whatever else you want. But yes, I'll 'PRAY' you get some korean girl lah, if it's God's will. I doubt it'll be Yu Ri though. =D 

Anyways, have a good one in UK and though you're studying very very hard i'm sure you have your source of syok-ness lah. 

Hillary Clinton @ International Islam University Malaysia. What an experience.  =)  

Passion, Inspiration, Motivation

I have none. Not a clear one at least.      Seriously. 

As i grow older, i hear more and more of such things. A friend of mine has excitedly decided to take a couple of months off from studies to do music. Another is planning to travel to Africa to reach out. Then there are some who plan to use their field of study to serve in missions. 

I think about my aunts who have all been to top universities and when they ask me about my plans, i try to think of the words to say, like trying to fill in a resume.

I'm tired of personality tests, tired of career counseling and people asking me what my interests are. I just want to Know. 

God gave me a piece of my future which i cannot seem to find where it fits. Yes, it's pretty awesome, though i wish it was something i could work on right now. I probably have lil' proximal goals but a vague distant goal. My mind is full of what ifs.  

Oh well, just thoughts. Not emo-ing. = P

I like this, and i wish the key to life was that easy.

What Faith Can Do by Kutless

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think it’s more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Don’t you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I’ve seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn’t ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I’ve seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That’s what faith can do

It doesn’t matter what you’ve heard
Impossible is not a word
It’s just a reason for someone not to try
Everybody’s scared to death
When they decide to take that step
Out on the water
It’ll be alright
Life is so much more
Than what your eyes are seeing
You will find your way
If you keep believing

Overcome the odds, You don't have a chance
(That’s what faith can do)
When the world says you can’t
It’ll tell you that you can!

"Light the candles, don't blow them out"

*sings* ....knowing God loves country music, but He loves Ps. Henry more. 

A church member wrote and presented a song for pastor's birthday!!! with a catchy touch of country tune in it.

  

What I liked about today..

Talking and laughing about random stuff and playing sesat music with Amanda Chua Khai Li!!!!  

 

Inertia scared me

The day i experience this, Chee woh posted on my wall. Just the person i needed to tell. heh. Why do you have to be so far awaayyy? There goes my 'Call-anytime-and-I'll-come-if-you're-stuck-or-lost-on-the-road' saviour. haha.  

BBQ under the rain

Today, i made the

most calls and sent the most text messages while driving. 

Beef patties are yummy!! 

Marshmallows are chewy and fun! (except when it comes to 'chubby bunny')

Go ROJAK! I'm so proud of you!

Thanks for pictures, Alvin!

"CAPTAIN BALL"

Haven't played a serious game in awhile. Haven't won a trophy in awhile. Haven't played under the hot, scorching, afternoon sun in a very long time. 

And i so enjoyed it. Except the heat which drains energy like crazy. Sun oh sun, why did you decided to release such fury? Our games were like 11+ till 3pm. WAAAH.  All i remember about the matches are running, jumping, cheering, and sweating. 

I thank God for sustaining me throughout. After the first game i felt the weird dizzy feeling again, which made me remember my 200m run experience in school. GG. Not cool. But i managed to play on without any problem. Awesome! Game after game, heat and wind, sweat and thirst, with awesome team mates who could jump super high, shoot super chun, defend super geng, catch super well and run super crazy. Such fun i had today! And i want some more!! haha

 

I'm so dead tired now that i want go to bed but i can't. Why? I think i binge-ate a lil during dinner. Was dying of hunger and thirst i tell you. Okay maybe not dying, but i haven't felt this feeling of hunger in awhile. We ran out of water before the last game so i went to church and danced without having any water to drink.

Dinner just tasted awesome. Pesto with mushrooms and satay. Simple, but i was SOO hungryyyy!!!! And now i'm stuffed. With ribena too. How am i to sleep? *yawns*. My legs are going to hurt tomorrow. And i have a pink neck!! Sigh, so much for wanting to look nice for prom.

Such a long long day. It'll be a busy day tomorrow too. 

CF PARTAY!!!!!

Woo hoo!!! makan lagi lah...aiyoyooo.

I is Malaysian, that's why.

I know this post is full of stuff which doesn't flow and it's all over the place. Haha. Goodnight! 

Nicole Tai Qi Hui turns 19!!!! And coming back soon! 

The time of birthdays! and a long friday.

Attendees : Victor (duh!), Jas, Manda, Yit han, Shok Chen, Bryan & girlfriend, Ira, Su and me. 

So, victor's early birthday surprise was a Surprise to him!!! The timing was right (gosh, the number of texts and calls i made). Though many people couldn't make it, it turned out good. The food was good and so was the fellowship. It's hard to keep a secret from someone. Good thing it wasn't for too long. hahaha. 

Congrats on passing the challenge of Receiving Victor!!! 

Blessed 19th!!! in advance. =)

Lunch was awesome. Though i ate more than i should have. It was soo good. We tried playing a random game "Tell about how we've been" but it only lasted ONE person, Victor. After that it was just talk about stuff under the sun. When we've realized we drank too much green tea, we headed of to the washroom and went window shopping. A good way to spend an afternoon, yes. 

OH!!! i tried on wigs today! aint that interesting?!! manda gets people to do random stuff which turn out to be fun. Seriously!!! Here's one wig i tried which victor got to snap secretly. heehee.

I think i look like a mature-kiddy-5 year old. How's that any sense right?

And probably will be able to pull off some 'cute' korean poses eh? *wink*

By the time i got home and freshen up, it was time to go to church for practice. Long day. Had class at 8, lousy com lab test after and worship leading which i didn't fully prepare for. Not cool. 

But i had a fun day. I love my friends. And Abi has decided to join the christmas dance!! muahaha. This is fun. A different christmas i shall have!!

Update!

I bought my Christmas presents today!!! Finally finally finally. I just Had to. Now, i'm just waiting for the holidays to come to read them. Though my December will be packed. Gosh

I NEED EXERCISE!!!!! YES I DOOO!!!! 

I have dance and captainball this week so that should do Some good, i hope. 

Actually, i just need friends to be closer to where i stay. Teman me. Exercise. 

JM made my day

Jaeson Ma is da man. He makes girls feel 'warm and fuzzy'? (well, i did)

This blog post is so so awesome. It's this week's weekly resource from Jon. Full of substance. I like. 

Click IT !!!! 

NEXT STOP "MANHOOD"

10101010

10pm on the 10th day of the 10th month of the year two-zero-10. Awesome.

Didn't know there were that many significant events to the number 10 in the bible till cg on friday. Pretty cool. I'm glad to have the opportunity to live through such a time to know this.  =)

Dance, Sweat and Bruises

Aunty Penny is awesome. Always. Everytime. Been awhile since she's choreographed dances for us. I'm thrilled!!  

There's always challenge with her around. Do-able challenges. Phew.  

In a couple of hours, i have now 2 patches of bruises on my knee. (So much for planning to wear a skirt tomorrow). hahaha. Also, knee guards are my dance partners now. They provide cushion as much as they can and hide the not-so-nice-looking bruises...

But injuries and tired muscles prove that i'm putting effort in it, yes?  

I'm hyped for Christmas presentation. Pretty interesting songs. Awesome. Let's do this!!!

Sisters. Yes.

Green day!!!

A blessing...

Great job to the CF people who performed for cultural night!!! You guys were awesome. I got so caught up in taking too many pictures. 

Esther and Tien gave a sweet and awesome end to their duet.

Ming han and his back ups! Man in the mirror  *claps claps*

Amazing love was just amazing. Even amongst students from other clubs, the words just filled the place. 

God, thank you for such opportunities. Thank you for talents you've given. Thank you for your amazing love. 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This incident overwrites the last one i tell you. 

When i received Twelve 50 cent coins as change, i made a fuss. Because of what i witnessed tonight, i shall complain no more. 

RM 6 in TEN CENT COINS!!!!!!!! (not me, or i would have made a bigger fuss). That's like...60 coins i tell you!!!!!!! FUUUUHHHH!!!!! 

When i was outside i heard the sound of coins falling *flashback*. When i got nearer i though it was the machine because of the constant sound. When i looked on the screen which showed "change of rm6, i looked down into the compartment and coins were STILL falling out!!!! i went out and the girl rushed back in, knowing she forgot her change. Poor girl. She went on and on about what she's gonna do about them. 

I laughed so hard. She did too. 

Sorry, it's just so funny. I don't mean to laugh at her in a mean way.

I wonder if the machine can get any more interesting. hahahaha. 

Letting it out in silence...

I should probably carve this on my wall:

I'm the eldest 

I'm the eldest 

I have to be wiser

I'm the eldest 

I'm the eldest 

I'm the eldest 

I have to know how to behave or I'll fail in life

I'm the eldest 

I'm the eldest 

I'm the eldest 

Baby steps, continued...

Ah,i can't find the post i wanted to..oh well.

Back-uped for Jon today. I gotta admit it wasn't that scary. A syok worship leader just gets everyone else hyped. I enjoyed it...all four sessions just got better and better...other than being a lil nervous because of Ps Joshua, it was good..he enjoyed it too. There's always improvement that can be done.

And here is my starting point for greater things ahead.  =)  

God, thank you for the opportunity and for an awesome youth leader. May You be exalted on high!!!  

Hype myself. Sounds fun

Birthday and Tragedy

I have 2 feelings at about the same moment. Joy wishing a friend a great birthday on skype and speechless-goosebump feeling when i heard someone i knew passed away tragically. 

Let's deal with the sad part first. Warren told me the news and i was shocked. Just couldn't believe it. I dare not imagine the scenario. I remember when i heard a similar news last year, it hit me so unexpectedly that i didn't have words to say. Why did people i know have to die? (its so human to think this way though life and death aren't in our control). I find it so hard to empathize with people when it comes to this. Things happen so suddenly, people start sharing their regrets and lend whatever help they can. Oh man, it's so unbelievable. =(

http://pressrepublican.com/0100_news/x1560863425/Hit-and-run-driver-identified

God, i don't know what to say....I pray you give his parents Strength to go on LIVING. Let them not wake up and go to bed everyday feeling such deep sorrow. Be their Hope. Amen.

Yes, so the better part for last. Almost forgot a friend's birthday until i got home and realized the date. (times when i don't write notes in my notebook, i tend to not be aware of the date). Sorry!  

So, he is away from home and has made skype calls on his 18th birthday. haha. Blessed birthday Wee yen!!! I was half past midnight and you Tried to stay awake. Awww. Many more surprises coming your way I'm sure! God will bless you in so many awesome ways i know it. 

Such fun!!

Woke up, drove to college, parked, hopped into victor's car and to SMSS we go!!!  (skipping computer class isn't so bad. hehe)

School still feels sorta like home. Aunty Molly's yummy tom yam bi hun. Still as sour, still the same colour. hehe. Food at college burns money. 

Teachers. I miss. 

So what did the four of us do?

BUM.

Pong struggled with the lock to the sports complex but it didn't budge. Half an hour. Then he settled for football. Matt, victor and i..set on the 'bleachers'. Guitar and camera and shouts of "BALL!!". Watched the girls do nothing cos they had no part of the beautiful FAKE GRASS field. Gosh it's so nice to see it green and not desert-looking. haha. 

When the sun came up, we moved to the hall. Never thought of bumming there. Weird. So we played emo music while victor took his 1 hour nap. The coolness of the aircond and the sound of the piano that stayed in the hall. Relaxing. 

Went to eat at a different chilli pan mee shop. Yum yum yum. Burn pocket some more. But food is good. With friends, even more fun. 

Thank you victor for driving meeeee!!! 

No turning back

*deep breaths*

Not mine, but Your will be done. You know what's best for me.  =)

STUPID GIRL. 

What should I do??

I hate it when it is my fault. I hate it when everyone is dragged down because of me. I hate it when this happens because of my own carelessness and mistake. 

SHAME.ON.ME

Heard a *thump* sound, and when i turned, i saw a girl a few feet away kneeling down to pick up her books. I saw a guy next to me who turned back too. 

And i feel really small now. Why didn't i go to her and help her? The whole time,i was thinking "Does she need help? She's picking them up so if she stands about now then she's okay". When i looked back at her, that thought played in my mind over and over and over. Somehow 'hoping' my thoughts of sympathy will help her get on her feet. Nonsense!!!! I deserve a smack on my head. 

I wish i could turn back time a couple of hours and do what my heart told me to. 

God, i'm sorry. There was an opportunity and i blew it. 

The day i decided to not feel spoilt

RapidKL, fail la you.

Don't say i didn't give you a chance to prove yourself. 

Fantasy kept alive

I do! I do! I do believe in fairies! I do! I do! I do believe in fairies! I do! I do! I do believe in fairies! *repeats* 

That was when i watched Peter pan. 

Today, i lil' girl from kindi smiled at me with her jolly face showing me the gap in her mouth where her tooth once was. She said "teacher! that day my tooth came out and then i put it under my pillow and the fairy gave me money! " I asked how much and she replied "1 dollar!!!" with the happiest smile. 

I reinforced her reactions. haha. Couldn't burst a bubble of a child. 

Huh? Sigh. Whee!

Distracted. Pray. Tired. Sweet potato mooncake. Almost-accident. Distracted. Replacement class. Fun. Metting. Tired. GHM. Distracted. Crickets. Blur. Coffee. Dance. Planning. Driving. Tired. Pray. Funny note on car. Distracted. Huge red ants. Chicken rice. God answering my cry. 

There. Summary of today. *deep breaths*

Rojak-nya. 

Throwing thoughts

Good day today. A lot of muscle tired-ness and sweat. Jogging in the morning was good. The cool air, the healthy people? haha. And then dance practice for this sunday. =(  This sunday. 

*breathes in* 

I cannot seem to not be myself. I did try. But i failed. Self-consciousness and the feeling of my lacking ability kicked in.

Usually it excites me to dance. Though i can't do it well, i love it. But something about this dance scares me, makes me wanna crawl under my shell. 

I've never had this tidak apa attitude during a last practice before. God help me. Help me not to focus on myself and what i cannot do. It's hard but to know you're watching me helps. Besides, Jon says this song means to be synchronized with you. 

YOU, and not my dance partner. 

I shall not complain. Paul says to run as if to reach the goal ahead. I just hope i'll be able to do it this weekend. 

R.E.S.T.

(most pictures by Annora Ong) I don't mean to 'steal' them okay. If you think they're awesome, they're HERS.  







Retreat was awesome. I wasn't satisfied with some things but i'm sure everything happened as God intended it to be. Also, i decided on my definition of REST at that moment : To know God has forgiven and i can let go.  =)

The games were fun. Though the water was murky, shampoo-ing hair outside a bathroom, flour AGAIN. Mess mess but a whole lotta fun. 

Awesome people know how to have fun!

Campers were diverse compared to last year. Interesting. Hopefully these people from everywhere will pull others from all over. The vision Joel had was WOW. It makes me excited to know that more cups will be filled. More and more. 

Water captain ball was FUN! Been too long since i played sports seriously. 2 hours in the pool laughing and splashing was just the best way to spend a non-sunny evening. The cool water, the noise as we scream constantly, Warren's endless diving and the nonsense-ness that go with it was just unexplainable fun. If i could do that every weekend and experience the same joy, i would love to. 

Time flies. Last year i was a 'newbie' and Joyce said that we're seniors this year already. I love CF people lah. I had so much fun. Most of the time, i thought, "Who cares if i had things to find rest in when people around me bring so much overflowing joy??". I did have my upset thoughts and reflections but everything just flies out the window with those people around. I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. I wish camps dont have to be so expensive and we can go more often!! haha  

My mortal and fun night partner and angel were awesome. Well, 'fun' at least. Jenn ming is the most happening mortal ever. Fed him too much chocolate that he had to exercise, muahaha. It was so much fun. Helped balance out since i didn't have the most 'LOVING' angel. haha.  

Fun night

I waited super long for my fun night date lorrr...was the last (not counting the emcees). Well at least i stood under the aircond longer. My Pyjama outfit was hot (as in a jacket,hot).    

Anyways, i didn't expect to have dinner with...

ALVIIIIIIN!!!!

(yeah i said that when i saw him)

His pyjamas was super cute lah..And, as gentleman as always, made me feel like a spoilt girl throughout dinner. I said a lot of "Yes, please", "okay, thank you" and *nodding of head*. My table was fun. Jarren and James had emcees as their 'dates' so the girls were rushing one another to eat. Super funny. When they left to emcee, James started to enjoy eating slower and Jarren had to finish what Chow Ern couldn't...what a scene! Like some movies when wives rush around and the men just lay back. hahahaha. Anyways, alvin signed everything on my checklist though i didnt accomplish everything. I felt bad that i did it all in front of him. hahaha. Good excuse to so it wasn't that embarrassing. phew. Awesome lah..i enjoyed the moment of being served. 

Girl's checklist :

1. Ruffle 2 guy's hair

2. Curtsy

3. Flutter eyelashes

4. Giggle uncontrollably

5. Flip hair and blow kiss

Nonsense right?? and guys got easier stuffs. 

James choong.*smacks forehead*. I felt like a lil' sacrificial lamb that God must be laughing down at. Before camp we were talking about Guardian Angel and he said he doesn't see the purpose or fun in it and that angels were not supposed to do this and that, so i told him that i would pity his mortal and begged him to be nice to whichever girl he gets. And i clapped my hands together and said "Please God, not me lah...don't la don't la" and i told him hopefully i wouldn't get him with lots of pleaseSSSS. 

AND I COULDN'T BELIVE IT. my jaw dropped. He was my angel. Noooooooo!!!! instead of flooding me with nice stuffs, he was just playfully mean saying his angel said to flick my ear 30 times. Thus, i felt like a sacrificial lamb. If it wasn't me, i would really pity the poor girl. sigh. oh well. Too much of being spoilt wouldn't be a good thing yes? (yeah I'm using a defense mechanism). It was fun having to be in his group though, super syok sendiri. Bet he could have done the whole skit on his own and still win first place. Good job lah! 

Berbonding with music session was awesome. I've always enjoyed these. In school, church and camps. Really really enjoyed it. Time just flied too fast and the night was going by too quickly. A camp without awesome musicians and syok sendiri people would be boring. 

Of course, reflection times. Given the instruction to think and reflect. And group sharing. One thing i like about this retreat, though it was only a short 3 days, we spent a lot of time with our groups. Discussions, devotion, games, and more discussion. I think it's the best way to really get to know one another in a short period of time. Sharing thoughts and opinions and praying for one another. That's comfort already. Glad that Jarren was in my group too. Got to catch up with him after all these years. God lets me meet people in interesting ways. He made an effort to come for camp though he only knew 1 0r 2 people. Claps. 

The One fact he remembered about me : A LEFT-EEEE!!!! 

At last.......

Camp commander!!! YOU DA MAN!!!

Camp committee, Good job! It's crazy planning for one but they did it! Woo hoo!!! No committee is ever perfect but God has always something new for everyone.  =) 

P.S. Buy the JELL-O cream!!!! 

To clear pimples

Group JELL-O

Blooper for the day

Mixer was interesting. I guess I should attend ADP's events sometimes just to mingle mingle. 

Spent quite a bit of time trying to figure out the best way to tie a bright orange-yellow-greenish beach skirt. I did it!! My new accomplishment. 

So what nonsense happened at this time of the day? 9pm.

Here, the paraphrased version since i can't remember the exact words.

Choong : Last time, when parking was 3 bucks, i put in a 10 and my change came out in 50 cent coins. 

Me : *laugh laugh laugh* (gets out of car, puts ticket into autopay machine and insert money)

(realized a stupid mistake and turned towards the car)

Me : oh crap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aaaaaahhhhh!!!!!!!  *sound of tons of coins dropping in the machine*

Choong : *LAUGHS*

Me : *whine whine whine*

Yup, i do that. Fall for mistakes even when i was JUST told. I now have a HEAVY wallet full of TWELVE 50cent coins. Awesome la lynn. *clap clap* 

CASH OUT TODAYYY!!!! the lady behind the counter smiled at me when mum said "Her first cheque". 

Yes, very happy. Thick thick wallet. hahaha. For now. 

CF Makan-Makan and New Toy!

Japanese food at Nihon Kai, old klang road. YUM! with lotsa green teeeaaa. 

The girls were late cos we took the wrong turn and had to make a huge u-turn. Whoops. 

But we all enjoyed a good time of fellowship and indulging. 

We shall do this again!!!!!! YES!!

After makan, some of us got caught in a bad jam and the clouds got too heavy ad had to release. Sigh.

But, we had more fun!!! 

Alvin, Victor, James, Jeremy, Kenneth gave me a very very entertaining afternoon in my home. After a first week of college, today was awesome!! (yes, i wonder where all the girls disappeared to)

Pictionary mania and monopoly deal!!!! what an unstoppable laughing session. 

Thank God for a good time at lunch and a good time with board games. So happy. 

What's more, Daddy got a new toy for the home! Finally!!!! Been asking and waiting for a DSLR (was hoping to get one by mid next year) and TA DA!!! i couldn't believe there's one in the family now! Except it's gonna go to aus for 3 weeks..THREEE man.. SOBS. I have to wait till after that...aaaahh...

Anyways, new toy with new pictures!!!

Today was a day of....

Wins,

Discouragement,

Art,

Threats,

And girly fun!